Monday, February 14, 2011

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

Actually, no... it's so not that at all.

Lots of people turn up their noses at Valentine's Day.  It's a manufactured holiday, they say.  All a scam to make money for Hallmark.  The chocolate companies are in on the deal too.  It's all manufactured.

First off, it isn't.  Perhaps the way we mark the day is manufactured and invented, but St. Valentine's day is a real day.  There were several Saints named Valentine, and over time, various legends and stories coalesced into a martyr for love.  Long before, I am quite certain, Hallmark was invented.

To tell the truth, the way we mark and celebrate Christmas is pretty far from the original intent and story, but no one thinks Christmas is a scam to sell greeting cards and chocolate.

But, enough historical perspective.  In no way would I want to take away from a day that celebrates love.  A day where people who have found love enjoy each other's company, and celebrate that love.  How can such a day be a bad thing?

For a normal someone, it's not.   For a single person, it might be a reminder that one is alone.

Oh but for a depressed someone who is also lonely, February the 14th is a heavy day indeed.  It's a rough one.  It's not up there with Christmas... but it's heavy.  It's a strong reminder that I am alone.  It's a strong reminder that I don't get to experience romantic love.  It's a strong reminder of the effects of depression on my life.  And yes, there's a small amount of anger.  The anger from before.  Anger at myself for being in this fix.

I want to swat at the anger like one would shoo a buzzing fly.  Get, get away from me, pesky anger!  Pesky depression brought on by a reminder of the state of my life!

Pesky.  I've always liked that word.

Today is probably going to be a rough one.

I've got to start my distraction techniques early in the day.

1 comment:

  1. Greetings,
    I think the general thought of love in regards to Valentine's Day, got caught up in the more unsavoury aspects of commercialism. Of course, true love, is more than the exchanging of cards.
    And yes those of us who are alone, isolated and experiencing mental health concerns, such occasions can enhance our feelings of being only a distant spectator in others' 'fun'.
    I counteracted my pain and depression that day by allowing our dog Penny to 'pawblish' a posting. A bit of light hearted humour has seen me through many a day.
    I do so hope that your positive distractions were of great benefit. For what it's worth, remember you are not alone and you have my ongoing support.
    In kindness and respect, Gary


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